You forgot your spouse's birthday!!

i'd go to the kitchen and make a mr.potato head except with a zucchini that vibrates (see more)

Give a million a excuses as I slowly walk towards the door. Then I run out and get into my time machine to go back to the previous day. Problem solved. (see more)

So what will you do?!

let me know!


so i can use it in the future...hahah jk ;P (see more)

*Grabs the nearest toilet paper and takes off clothes*
5 minutes later....
UNWRAP ME, Birthday girl!! (see more)

sorry babe happy birthday, oh and TAKE A LOOK INSIDE ITS MY WANK IN A BOX!! (see more)

sorry babe what do you want and your wish is my command (see more)

"what are you talking about, 'forgot your birthday'?"

*turns on music, sits him in a chair & give him a lapdance*

true story (see more)

I would be like "shoo girl, what are you talking. me forgetting your birthday. I didnt want to ruin it for ya, but lets just say kanye is on his way to here" an hour later I tell her kanye is pissed because he didnt win an award, he is too sad to come. (see more)