Best movie or TV show quote ever!

Ziva David: Well, you know what they say. You cannot make an omelet without breaking a few legs.
Anthony DiNozzo: She's never making me breakfast.

Timothy McGee: Uh, Ziva, it's `without breaking a few eggs´ (see more)

Donald Lydecker:
Alcoholism is not a disease, it's a failing. You've turned it into a church. You worship the altar of self-pity. I come to these rooms for one reason, to remember what I don't want to become... helpless, impotent and weak.  (see more)

"You can't punch the gay out of me any more than I can punch the ignoramus out of you." - Kurt Hummal (Glee)
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Homer:
Bart, with $10,000 we’d be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like…love! (see more)

Homer:
You don’t like your job, you don’t strike. You go in every day and do it really half-assed. That’s the American way. (see more)

My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions, loyal servant to the true emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife. And I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next.
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Would you be willin' to trade ALL the days, from this day to that, for one chance, just one chance, to come back here and tell our enemies that they may take our lives, but they'll never take... OUR FREEDOM!
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Ross' mythic quote :

WE WERE ON A BREAAAAAK ! (see more)

SuperBad
Seth: You know how many foods are shaped like dicks? The best kinds.  (see more)

At Manticore, Lydecker used to tell us the same thing - "there are no limits. "What the mind can conceive, the body can achieve... With the right training." (see more)

how do i look in red !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (see more)

from Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy

Ron Burgundy: ....they named it San Diego... which, of course, in German translates into... a whales vagina...

funniest movie ever
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"Run Forest Run!" (see more)

Tony: Gibbs will get in he has clearence that will let him see the dead aliens at area 51
Kate: that's because he probably killed them (see more)

We're gonna need a bigger boat. (see more)

Where are we?? (see more)

Luck is where opportunity meets preparation !!! (see more)

My name is Russell Eddington and I have been vampire for nearly 3000 years. Now the American Vampire League wishes to perpetrate the notion that we are just like you. In, I suppose, in a few small ways we are: we are narcissists, we care only about getting what we want, no matter what the cost - just like you. Global warming, perpetual war, toxic waste, child labour, torture, genocide - that's a small price to pay for your SUVs, your flat screen TVs, your blood diamonds, your designer genes, your absurd garish mansions! Futile symbols of permanence to quell your quivering spineless souls. But no. In the end we are nothing like you. (see more)

Captain's Log, stardate 9529.1. This is the final cruise of the Starship Enterprise under my command. This ship and her history will shortly become the care of another crew. To them and their posterity will we commit our future. They will continue the voyages we have begun, and journey to all the undiscovered countries, boldly going where no man... where no one has gone before. (see more)

Stu Price:
[playing piano and singing passionately]
What do tigers dream of when they take their little tiger snooze? Do they dream of mauling zebras, or Halle Berry in her Catwoman suit? Don't you worry your pretty striped head, we're gonna get you back to Tyson and your cozy tiger bed. And then we're gonna find our best friend Doug, and then we're gonna give him a best friend hug. Doug, Doug, oh, Doug, Dougie, Dougie, Doug, Doug! But if he's been murdered by crystal meth tweakers,
[stops suddenly]...well then we're shit out of luck.  (see more)