funniest quote

"Wal-Mart???, What's a Wal-Mart??? Do they sell Wall stuff there!!!"


-Paris Hilton (see more)

"I get to go to lots of overseas places, like Canada."
- Britney Spears (see more)

were you goin im gonna rub my nutsack on your drumset

stepbrothers (see more)

Nature shows suck ass, though cobras are pretty sweet. Pretty much any animal that has a gang named after it is pretty bad ass. I would go with an animal combo, like a bear that carried a cobra -- total unstoppable force. Give that thing wings and humanity is fucked. (see more)

"what happens if you get scared half to death twice?"

-from goodquotes.com (see more)

"they misunderestimated me!"
-george w. bush (see more)

"All I can report is it was a size 9."*George Bush after shoes were thrown at him.* (see more)

Customer: Hi, can I have a coffee? Black?
Delaney: Can't you see we talking, White? (see more)

Linda the Teacher: You have been a bad boy.
Wheeler: Oh yes I have.
Linda the Teacher: You have been misbehaving, and now you need to stay after class.
Wheeler: While this is one of my top fantasies, I need to get back to my friend.
Linda the Teacher: Are you sure?
[She takes off her dress]
Wheeler: Oh he'll be fine. He's 10.  (see more)