Kick azz and chew gum!

So I come home early from work one day. Little earlier then normal. I grab my stuff from the truck. Head for the front door, turn the key, open the door and walk right into a home invasion in progress!
3 teenagers have decided that my house is so nice they wanna be inside and see what I have. Seems they where not expecting me home so soon by the look on there faces. The only thing stoping them from going through the back door are my Pitbulls. The front door is blocked by me with my tools, oh yea and my 3 FOOT MAGLITE.
At this point I have already swallowed my gum. Only one thing left to do. . . . (see more)

so i was ibying one day.
sometime last week.
got hungry so i put some left over fries from mcdonald's in the microwave.
not for too long though, just about 30 seconds.
when it was finished, i noticed they were still cold.
so i put it back for another 30.
but still,
coldness.
my hunger was slowly increasing.
so i put the bitches in the microwave for a minute and 30 seconds.
and still,
coldness.
i thought to myself -
what the fuck bro?
and that's when i realized..





the microwave was set to defrost.


marijuana does effect the memory. (see more)