Quotes from Funny Movies

Wes Mantooth: What are you doing on our station's turf, Burgandy? You're about to get a serious beatdown.

Champ Kind: I will smash your face into a car windshield and then take your mother Dorothy Mantooth out for a nice seafood dinner AND NEVER CALL HER AGAIN.

Wes Mantooth: Dorothy Mantooth is a Saint! You here me? Dorothy Mantooth is a Saint!

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I know they were just kids...but man we beat the fuck out of them! (see more)

"I have nipples, Greg. Could you milk me?"  (see more)

JIM: "Well, it got so that every piss-ant prairie punk who thought he could shoot a gun would ride into town to try out the Waco Kid. I must have killed more men than Cecil B. DeMille. It got pretty gritty. I started to hear the word "draw" in my sleep. Then one day, I was just walking down the street when I heard a voice behind me say, "Reach for it, mister!" I spun around... and there I was, face-to-face with a six-year old kid. Well, I just threw my guns down and walked away. Little bastard shot me in the ass. So I limped to the nearest saloon, crawled inside a whiskey bottle, and I've been there ever since. " (see more)

"From now on, your dick is my dick. I'm gonna get you laid."
-Jay from 40 year old virgin
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"names barf, im a mog, half man half dog, im my own best friend (see more)

Prince John: “What can you tell me about Robin of Locksley?”
Latrine: “Robin of Locksley? Robin of Locksley? Hmm, let me see.”
[starts cooking up a potion in her cauldron]
Latrine: “Raven's egg! Blood of a hen! A little more blood, yes! Eyeballs of a crocodile! Testicles of a newt! I bet he's a transsexual now! Robin of Locksley is handsome and brave. He seeks to regain his family's honor. Little sod could be trouble.”
Prince John: “Are you certain?”
Latrine: “Certain? You want certain, hire yourself a witch! Me, I'm just your cook.”
[serves contents of the cauldron]
Latrine: “Here, eat that.”  (see more)

Mom, I honestly thought I was gonna be raped for a second. He had the craziest look in his eyes. And at one point he said, "Lets get it on."  (see more)

"Maybe someone should tell that to rain man because he practically bankrupted a casino and he was a ra-TARD."-Alan (see more)

Ron: The spiders they want me to tap dance....... i dont want to tap dance
Harry: You tell those spiders Ron
Ron: Yeah i'll tell those spiders
*falls instantly back to sleep* (see more)