The Worst Thing About Your Town

I was driving down the street today and a girl jaywalked right in front of me. She made it to the median, but I was traveling too fast to let her go.

As I stared at her in disbelief and near panic, I thought that she looked a lot like SI swimsuit model Marisa Miller. I checked the rearview. Marisa Miller. I craned my neck, forsaking self-preservation and common sense. Marisa Miller.

Then I thought - you know what - that probably WAS Marisa Miller. I live in Los Angeles, for fuck's sake, and I was passing a high-end clothing boutique. Why not?

Sadly, I then began to lament how I can never score a model like Marisa Miller. I'm only 5'8. In heels, MM is like 6'2, I imagine!

Unless I pulled a Spade -beguiling her with wit, charm, and humor - I'd never have a chance.

Fuck Los Angeles for making me think these things! Fuck LA for making the idea that a jaywalking woman who looked like Marisa Miller might actually be Marisa Miller a reasonable assumption! (see more)

Don't get me wrong, I love whales just as much as the next person, but dude if you want to watch them, then pull the eff over and get off the road! Don't slow down to twenty MPH--we're not all on effing vacation here, some of us have jobs to get to! And yes, they love to jaywalk also!!! Have some effing consideration! (see more)

Pittsburgh is the second largest city in Pennsylvania, yet there is NO transportation anywhere! The few buses that do exist run only in the most dangerous sections of town and are only available twice a day... At the moment, the busing system is being funded by a drink tax the city government put on beer and other bottled drinks :S (see more)

They've made a stupid movie in this town where I was born. It's about someone from the South coming there, where it sucks, and finally doesn't want to leave. It was the quitest town ever, and now there are dumb tourists who come to buy cheese, beer and visit the belfry.  (see more)

so Winnipeg manitoba is the city with the most homicides per capita isn't that great:O (see more)

I hate glenside, pennslyvania because everyone is so into parenting someone who's a grown man, who has a part-time job who works 1-day a week. I also hate glenside because i live in a small twin house which i'm not Comfortable (see more)

i live in the frontier soo theres a loot of people from other citys like the veracruzanos this cuty is full of them and there like sooo anoying everybodys who is from this city hates them and its full of drug sellers its very dangerous cause you never know who are you talking with,, (see more)