Speeding Ticket Excuse

"Officer, the reason why I was speeding, is because I saw the Sasquatch and he stole my umbrella, and the forecast is calling for rain, and I just got my hair done. Holy cheesenips your butt looks killer in those pants, now if you'd please let me go, I have a Sasquatch to catch, hence the beef jerkey in my passenger seat." (see more)

Sorry Officer. I really have to use the bathroom and I'm trying to find the next pitstop or something!!  (see more)

I'm late for my date !!! (see more)

i didn't know i couldn't do that. (see more)

ITS HAPPENED AND ALL I HAD TO SAY WAS.. OFFICER, MY HUSBAND IS DETECTIVE SO AND SO, AND WORKS AT SAID DISTRICT... WORKS EVERY TIME, EVEN THOUGH ITS NOW MY EX. (see more)

my brother ate a chili dog and he has stomach ache
were going to bring him to the hospital
 (see more)

*In a very rushed manner*: "Officer, my wife is in labor at the hospital. My flight just got in from Afghanistan. I'm only here on leave and I can't miss the birth!" (see more)

Act like your impaired physically.
I simply roll all my widows down so he has a full view of me as he walks up to the window. i twist my left arm over so looks like i have no real use in it. when he asks for my lisence and registration i make sure to fumble it in my hads like i can't grasp it correctly. I'll even make him reach in and grab it from my limp hand. THE LOOK ON THIER FACES. Pricless.
I've gotten 6 warnings with this manuver.
YEA YEA IT SUXS AND ITS LOW. But Fux it better then getting a ticket. (see more)

seriously how did you catch me? (see more)

late 4 a funeral (see more)

My husband is a cop!
Even though we are divorced, I still say it, it works :) (see more)

I swear officer! The sign of the speed limit was covered by the tree branch! (see more)