Chuck Norris!

Chuck Norris does not own a house. He walks into random houses and people move. (see more)

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris. (see more)

Chuck Norris once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink. (see more)

Bruce Lee beat Chuck Norris in a movie. Bruce Lee died in real life. Lesson: Don't even pretend to beat Chuck Norris (see more)

Chuck Norris asked for a Bic Mac at Bob's. They gave him one... (see more)

In the average room Chuck Norris can kill you with 1,242 objects....including the room (see more)

The fastest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris' fist. (see more)

Chuck Norris' first job was as a paperboy. There were no survivors (see more)

Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loded gun and won. (see more)

We can swim through water...
Well guess what?
Chuck Norris can swim through land.  (see more)

Chuck Norris doesn't wear a watch...HE decides what time it is. (see more)

he has the cure for cancer. Too bad it's in his tears. (see more)

Chuck Norris doesen`t do pushups .. he pushes the ground (see more)

Chuck Norris can make a woman pregnant just by saying "booyah."  (see more)

Chuck Norris can speak braille (see more)

Chuck Norris is the only person who can actually give 110% (see more)

when you open a can of whoop ass chuch norris pops out.  (see more)

In the first Jurassic Park movie, the Tyrannosaurus Rex wasn't chasing the jeep. Chuck Norris was chasing the Tyrannosaurus AND the jeep. (see more)

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
hahahhaah (see more)

Chuck Norris s know to be the only man who has the best Poker hand in the world, despite the fact that the cards he used was an Ace of Spades; a Joker card, an Wild Uno card; a Dollar Bill, and a Get Out of Jail Free card from Monopoly. (see more)