Too Much Information

I heard an interview a few years back with Big Screen 'Legend' Will Smith, and for some reason, he felt the need to confess that rather than using regular toilet tissue, he always cleanses himself with medicated pads.

His reasoning: "If [feces] landed on your arm, would you only use paper to wipe it off?"

Obviously, the answer is 'no.' You'd use soap or a disinfectant of some kind. I mean, otherwise that's just gross.

You should know that since then, my bathroom is stocked with medicated, hemorrhoid pads for use after defecation.

What, TMI?

I enjoy a thoroughly cleansed and disinfected anus... ;P (see more)

okay it wud be kinda stupid and tellin him too much on the first date if i told him about my pepsi crush!! see he mite think im delusional that i have a crush on a drink!! he mite neva call again!! hmm wait!!! nawww!!lmao!!

*subliminal msg*
DRINK PEPSI!!lmao (see more)

Umm so just so you know i have irritable bowel syndrome so when we coproduce our children might have it to. (see more)

I have a slight case of Asperger's syndrome don't worry its not contagious its a mental disorder it just means I'm awkward in social situations like dates or meeting your family........ (Long Pause) (see more)

haha on the first date. so on our wedding day we should get a big cake and have a super small wedding
WOW HOLD THE f@CK UP. I AINT GONNA MARRY YOUR @SS!!! - yea kinda went overboard sorry =[ (see more)

there is no need to be a testament.just say my father is not liberal and not allow a lot of things...i will see what happens. (see more)

Well when i was born my umbilical cord was really hard to cut but when it did cut the slime went everywhere =)

Wait what? Too much information?  (see more)

once i was sick and kinda crazy and i didn't know wat was happening cuz the medicnce was like really strong and it was like i was druged so i went to the bathroom and made a giant poop so big that like 4 inches came out of the water and i called everyone in my grade that and i sent picture to everyone on my contact list and then wen i went bak to school peeps were live so, umm, gtg bii. then my bff told me and i felt so stupid and gross!!! (see more)

me:hey u know when i was in kindergarden i lost one of my teeth and i was realy excited then i decided to try a magic trick by sticking it in my nose and blowing it out pretending that my nose made teeth but it didnt come out so i started picking my nose and it dissapeered i got it back when i was in the bath room though
Girl:uhhh i forgot that i have to go to my moms funeral

Note:this is a true story but i didnt say it on my first date (see more)

If you told your girlfriend that you would rather go on IBY then listen to her talk.

ladies, listening is the bad end of the deal! (see more)

when i was four i used to sleepwalk, and one time i was sleepwalking i went into the kitchen,pulled down my pants and ALMOST peed all over the carpet.(this all happened when i was 4,i don't sleep walk any more.) (see more)

I love pie. It's the best thing that's happened to me, next to my rubber ducky overalls! I LOVE my Pikachu action figure! I play with it ALL night, usually for about 6 hours straight! Whenever a hot girl comes by, I know how to get her for a date. This is my procedure:
1. Walk up to her
2. Stare at her chest
3. Say "boobies!!!!!!!!"
4. Walk away
The girl will usually beg you to go on a date! (see more)