What Would Your Wallet Say?

"Hey c_tizzie! I've been doing some thinking, and I think it would be a good idea if I lock myself when you are intoxicated. You see - I've watched in horror as you 'make it rain' at strip clubs, overtip bartenders just because they're sexy, and buy rounds of drinks for people who wouldn't piss on your face if your teeth were on fire.

Also, I really want you to take the condom out of me. I mean, I don't know whether it's a good thing that you haven't used it in years - or a very, very bad thing.

Just some thoughts...Oh yeah, your driver's license picture makes me giggle. And did I mention that I like touching your ass all day? It's sweet!" (see more)

Please please pleeeeaaaasee!!! STOP sitting on meee!!! your squashing mee!!  (see more)

where the hell am i oh seriously you seriously lost me your so dumb (see more)

"im sick of holding your stuff! i know what I'll do for payback, I'll destroy that condom...unwanted teenage pregnancy here you go!" (see more)

my wallet would say that I put too much crap in it... I probably shouldn't keep all those time clock receipts in there (see more)

I R HUNGRY.
You never feed me. (see more)

Dude? Im back here. In your back pocket! Why dont you fill me sometime? We hardly ever see each other. Unless your getting a traffic ticket. (see more)

come on dude put me down ive had enough of being flipped open and grabbed and shoeved in and out of pockets im tired i want a holiday (see more)

Why do you even have me, you broke. (see more)

If my wallet said anything about me,It would say:Idiot...... (see more)

Maybe if you got a job I wouldn't be empty all the time (see more)

Hey buddy why dont you feed me sometime pal? you know i have feeling 2. get a job before i starve! (see more)

God Damnit. tkae me out of ur back pocket. it smells like horse shit.

And another thing, dude u need to get a new drivers license picture cuz if i had a penis id wet my self its so funny.

I also recremend u get a job instead of looking at porno mags all day. u need money. SO STOP SPENDING UR CASH ON HOOKERZ.



!!!!!!!!!BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!! (see more)

Same thing your mom says:
"Take this condom out of me" (see more)

ma vada via il cu' terrun!! (see more)

It wouldnt say anything cuz it hasnt eaten a dollar in a long time... its dead T_T (see more)

mom took 5 bucks last week.. last night... and this morning while you were sleeping.. aaaand now youve only got your drpepper lip gloss in here ;) i gotchyer back though. (see more)

she wud say, im tired of being in ur skool bag, let me out so i can drool at all the sexi guys passin!!! lol (see more)

god dammit you just had to eat the f#$%!ing burrito (see more)